sometimes i think i'm a bit too forgiving with my friends. that i let things go too easily. because i value my relationships with people too much to ever put any strain on it. when i was growing up, i was consistently a loner, or on the outside of the group. when i finally came to high school, i found myself rather desperate for companionship. not necessarily of the romantic kind, although that would have been nice (that's me the anti-playa.) however, due to not relating very well to the people around me, my poor and poorly exercised social skills, and the lack of any sort of friend base to work with, trying to find any close friends has been a trial in determination. as it is, i have only one friend that i could describe as "close". i met my friend phil in electronics class (possibly reinforcing the nerd stereotype there, i know) in my sophomore year, and we've been friends ever since. although, last year, we didn't hang out much (i missed a lot of school, and when i was there, he was very boring around his girlfriend.) he's the only friend that i don't regularly agonize over what he thinks of me. and that's part of what i think i shouldn't just let go, is making clear just how my friends feel about me hanging out with them.
